Prepare the bun tins!

The oven is warmed up, now all we have to do is prepare the mixture!

Last night was my very last injection for this cycle of IVF(I'm secretly hoping that it will be my last injection ever to do with this madness that is IVF!).

Had my orders for the nurse to inject my ovitrelle at 9.15pm, & as you all know theres no hesitating with the jab, you literally have to take the top off & jab straight away or you lose the precious meds as they start leaking out. So I had to physc myself up for this, took a while, but after a short hesitation I done it! Has anyone else noticed that this needle seems to be a hell of alot thicker than all the others??Bled for quite a while after, but I thought hey this is the last one & I've coped so much better this time round with the jabs, so I was proud of myself that I'd got through the first stage.

But what I had forget about was the pain you feel about 6 hrs later! It woke me up about 3.30am & I was in agony, I couldn't get back to sleep & I had to get up about 30 times(slight exaggeration there,but it felt like alot!) to keep peeing!

At 6.10am I'd had enough & got up,only to find that standing upright wasn't going to be happening for a while! My hat goes off to all the ladies that have lots of follicles & suffer like this for weeks, I think I would have to take to my bed if I'd suffered like this on a daily basis !

But after forcing myself to walk around, & a nice cup of redbush tea, I started to feel alot better.

I've got my orders to be at the clinic for 8.45am tomorrow morning, which means we'll have to set off about 7.15, but I know I won't sleep tonight. I'm worried that I'm going to be ill like I was last time, & because I know what to expect I'm very anxious about the whole process.

For me this is the start of the next stage which I don't like very much ,this is when it suddenly hits you that its real & its happening!When your injecting you can almost push all the thoughts to the back of your mind & kid yourself its not happening, but once them babies are out that's when it hits me like a ton of bricks & I might lose it completely!All the calmness might come crashing down & I'll be a quivering wreck(I'm hoping that this doesn't happen).

But I have alot to take my mind off it all, as this week is a bit of a mad week, I'm going in tomorrow, my mum is going into hospital Thursday & we just heard that we've got to take Fern to the specialist Thursday & he is going to operate on her leg!So I'm not going to worry about me to much & focus my worrying on my mum & Fern! I think Fern is one of the reasons that I've been so calm this time round, I've been so worried about her, I've forgotten about me.

I've been told that I will go back for my transfer either Thursday,Friday or Sunday. I think it will be Friday as I don't think I'm going to have enough quality embryos to go for blastocyst, but I'm OK with that, lots of ladies have had a day 3 transfer & its been successful.

So all I'm going to do is take each day as it comes, listen to the Zita West CD to keep calm & take it easy,I don't think you can do more than that, oh yeah almost forgot,& to wear lucky orange knickers every day from tomorrow!!!(& pray for a miracle to happen!)

I plan to take a few days off & then I will go back to work, as I drove myself crazy last time as I stayed at home the whole time & my mind ran away with me every day!

So I have the bun tins ready,waiting for the special mixture!

If anyone else is baking,good luck & I wish you lots of baby dust in your buns!

Love Mrs K x