So here I am, day 7 of my 2nd IVF cycle, & I gotta say its been a funny old week. I got myself rather worked up on the first day of injecting,as those of you that know me know that I have a fear of needles. I woke really early & just kept putting it off, but after 2 hrs I knew that I just had to get on with it,I mean I've done it once before,you'd think I'd be a pro by now,but I'm not, I'm a big baby when it comes to any type of pain, god only knows what I would be like if I did, by some miracle become pregnant & get to experience the joy of LABOUR!
So anyway I thought this is silly,just do it!! so I did, I sat there & stabbed myself twice before I eventually injected myself! Palms were sweating & heart was racing at this point,what a big baby! You might ask "why didn't Mr K do your injection?", well he had gone fishing with the hounds so I could relax before the emotional roller coaster began, & when I asked him if he would like to inject me on my last cycle he chickened out! said he didn't wanna hurt me! Silly thing is, it doesn't even hurt, so why do I get myself so worked up???
I was fine after the injection, until late afternoon when I started to feel really sick, wasn't sure whether it was due to the Suprecur or the overall build up of the injection! but continued to feel sick all night.
I was fine the next day(which was mothers day) went out with my mum,aunts & cousins for the day. Felt a bit awkward as one of my aunties started to ask me when I would be "having another go" as they like to put it, I then had to lie & say "oh soon, not sure when" me & my mum just looked at each other & raised our eyebrows!! I hate keeping it from my family, but I just don't want all the phone calls on "the dreaded test day" especially if it is bad news, & by people not knowing I feel like life is carrying on as normal as possible, as last time it was all everyone talked bout, Jacqui & her IVF.
I was fine after the injection, until late afternoon when I started to feel really sick, wasn't sure whether it was due to the Suprecur or the overall build up of the injection! but continued to feel sick all night.
I was fine the next day(which was mothers day) went out with my mum,aunts & cousins for the day. Felt a bit awkward as one of my aunties started to ask me when I would be "having another go" as they like to put it, I then had to lie & say "oh soon, not sure when" me & my mum just looked at each other & raised our eyebrows!! I hate keeping it from my family, but I just don't want all the phone calls on "the dreaded test day" especially if it is bad news, & by people not knowing I feel like life is carrying on as normal as possible, as last time it was all everyone talked bout, Jacqui & her IVF.
Felt sick again all afternoon & evening & just prayed that I would not feel like this for the next month. I didn't have any side effects last time(apart from some moodiness which Mr K would say is normal!).
Monday woke up feeling full of life & energy,thinking "yes I can do this"& I was really positive.
All change Tuesday!!!!Dramatic loop the loop on the roller coaster!Didn't know what was wrong with me, sat talking to Mr K in his office & the tears just started to roll down my cheeks, then got angry with myself for crying for no particular reason, spent the rest of the day very subdued.
Poor Mr K took the brunt of it on Wednesday & Thursday, he hadn't done anything wrong, but everything he did do got on my nerves if you know what I mean, just wanted him to leave me alone & scream at him "I'VE ONLY GOT ONE NERVE & YOUR GETTING ON IT!!!"poor Mr K!
Then I felt bad as he was constantly asking me "what have I done?",so I was honest & told him "you haven't done anything wrong, but your really getting on my nerves for no reason", & it was strange, because no sooner had I told him I felt so much better & have been in a very good mood today, apart form the permanent state of confusion I seem to have developed, I here words coming out of my mouth & they don't make any sense & I have no idea where they came from,its almost like I have another person living in my body that has taken over my power of speech,& I got spots!!lol, I never get spots,am lucky to be blessed with very good skin.
There are two things that have got me through this week, firstly, my acupuncture session, which was amazing!had a needle put in the top of my head & it felt like all my woes were flowing out through the needle! secondly, Zita West, thanks to the lovely helenlegh(if you don't follow her on twitter please do so!) who lent me the Zita West CD, it has been a god send!I even play it in my car to calm down my road rage! Seriously, if you don't have this CD you must get it!
So here I am now waiting for my AF to arrive, then I can get my scans booked & get an estimate for my egg collection. I hate not knowing when its going to happen, I've sort of worked it out, but it all depends on the delightful visit of Aunt Flo!
So here I am now waiting for my AF to arrive, then I can get my scans booked & get an estimate for my egg collection. I hate not knowing when its going to happen, I've sort of worked it out, but it all depends on the delightful visit of Aunt Flo!
Sorry if I have rambled on a bit,but I feel I had alot to get off my chest! I think I need to try & do more blogs, but shorter, but I don't seem to have the time.
Anyway must go now as I've really gotta stir the Suprecur in well so its mixed just right & then I can add the Gonal-F.
Happy Baking
love Mrs K xx
No comments:
Post a Comment